Marriage and fishing

Because I fish so much I get asked all the time "how do you do it?". I say proper pre-screening is key. I had a girlfriend many years ago that was a smoking hot borderline nymphomaniac, sounds perfect right? She had one major flaw. Let me set the scenerio.
   
  We decided to go to a lake that was quite a ways down some dirt roads in Montauk, NY. When we get there she gets out of the Jeep pulls a tent out and starts setting it up. I'm thinking to myself that if she gets tired of fishing she wants to be able to take a nap, that's fine by me I prefer being unencumbered while I'm fishing anyway. I set up a couple of rods for myself and she sets up one for herself( I still have to tie the damn knots though). We wade into this fantastic warm water and start casting. It is literally a fish every or every other cast, all cookie cutter Largemouths about 2-3 lbs each. Do you have any idea how much fun that is? Did I mention she had a bikini top on? Well after about an hour or so of this she sidles up next to me and asks if I want to go to the tent. Didn't I say that we were getting fish on nearly every cast?

  I of course keep casting and she goes back to the tent after whispering some other nonsense that I never heard in between casting to and catching bass. RED FLAG number 1- NO suitable mate would ever leave active fish to go hang out in a tent! After a few minutes(O.K. it was 45 of them) she peeks out of the tent and asks if I'm going to join her any time soon. I have moved a little further down the bank looking for a fresh batch of fish and almost fail to notice that she is topless. RED FLAG number 2- No suitable mate would ever seek to distract someone that is stalking fish! I mean I nearly tripped over that log and scared the 4 lb'r that was lurking on the other side!

 As it started getting dark I heard the horn beeping. She had already packed up the tent and was waiting patiently(no, not really) for me to stop fishing aand go home. RED FLAG number 3- No suitable mate would honestly expect that darkness would put an end to fishing. I seriously started questioning the relationship at this point, especially when she threatened to drive off and leave me there. RED FLAG number 4- No suitable mate would leave you alone and in the dark without at least bringing coffee and some food so that you could fish through the night!

 Sad to say that shortly after that we broke up, I'm still not sure why. It did however impress upon me some very important characteristics of a suitable fishing wife.

1- She needs to realize that fishing comes before all else.
2- Sometimes that new hyper-graphite space technology rod IS more important than paying rent on time.
3-It's probably better if she either doesn't fish or is as addicted as you are.
4-If she's going to be out in the woods topless than she better have a (fishing) rod in her hand and not try to distract you from that fish you're hunting.
5-She MUST realize that the fish will NOT be there later and if they are then that just means you can catch more of them.
6-Fishing comes before all else.

There are more but I'm hoping that when somebody actually starts following this blog that they'll post their own ideas.


Later
DW

Getting Started

I feel a little stupid writing this, seeing as how I'm the only one that can read it right now. This is just me getting going here as the title so obviously states. First thing to figure out is how to resize my damn photos so that I can have a background that actually says something about me and MY awesomeness. Instead of making it simple with an auto resize they are making me get off my ass and actually learn something about how to make a computer work for me, instead of the other way around. Usually I would just write it off and say "fuck it" (strong language will pop up here from time to time). However, since this is mine and I have to own it I better learn. So, with that little intro if someone does actually read this and can help a technological cripple any advice would be appreciated.

Later
DW